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Ah, the martini… An iconic drink popularized by the ease of bootleg gin production during Prohibition and made even more popular as the signature drink of James Bond. He got it wrong, however, with the “shaken and not stirred” bit. The perfect way to prepare a martini is with a small dash of SHUT THE HELL UP AND ENJOY YOUR DRINK!

The first thing a bartender will do if you order your martini with that line is roll their eyes and then proceed to make it however he or she wants to make it because unless you really know your shtick, you won’t know the difference. The only thing you’ll accomplish in shaking a martini is introduce additional water to the mixture, diluting the drink and making it more “smooth.” What you’re actually doing is ruining a perfectly fine beverage.

With that being said, tonight I’m having a dirty gin martini made with Bluecoat Dry Gin– shaken, not stirred, because I’m a shameless hypocrite who does what he wants. Haha.

Bluecoat is an American gin produced in Philadelphia. It honors the courage of the Bluecoats in their battles against the British Redcoats during the Revolutionary War. Irony is the name of the game here, as this one tastes strikingly similar to Beefeater, a London Dry Gin, with perhaps a more daring amount of juniper and only a bit less fire.

That being said, this isn’t a bad gin and it isn’t a great gin. It’s a standard gin that comes in a sexy blue bottle. So, if you purchase your booze for the sake of having a pretty-looking liquor cabinet, this one’s right up your alley. At around the $20-$25 mark, it’s not a waste if you don’t absolutely fall in love with it, which you probably won’t.

As previously stated, this is a standard gin that makes some good mixed drinks. It goes perfectly well with an evening of lounging around listening to some Richard Cheese. The juniper is in full-effect with this one, at least, and I can’t complain about that. After all, if you don’t like juniper, you don’t like gin, and what kind of person does that make you, hmm?

Actually, come to think of it, perhaps Bond had it right the whole time… this martini is tasting really good. Perhaps you can’t trust everything you read on the internet. Perhaps it’s best to find out for yourself. Get my drift?